It’s Better Down Where It’s Wetter (Take it From Me)

By Lily Sahaguian, Clinical Intern

Female vaginal lubrication is a natural part of our response to sexual stimuli – plus a useful aid to friction-free, pleasurable sex. Yet mainstream media often perpetuates myths and misconceptions about female wetness, which leaves some women embarrassed or ashamed during intimacy — laying down towels, apologizing for messes, or trying to avoid squirting for fear that it’s pee. 

Shifting our mindset about that wetness from shame to pride can empower us to self-discover and better attune to our bodies in order to feel more pleasure in the bedroom. 

Physical arousal, including lubrication, often happens as a response to the emotional experience of feeling aroused. During intimacy, blood flows to the genitals, which plumps up the vaginal walls and leads to a release of  a liquid called arousal fluid. Continued arousal can also lead to an additional release of arousal fluid – either a trickle or a release with gentle force – also known as female ejaculation or squirting. This comes from two glands within the vagina (the bartholin and skene glands). 

It’s normal for lubrication to also occur at times that you’re not feeling aroused —and you may also feel super aroused without noticing physical signs as there are myriad factors that affect lubrication. So wetness shouldn’t be used as an indicator of how turned on you are (your voice should do that)—but it should absolutely be embraced (not shamed) when it’s there, however it chooses to show up … it’s not abnormal, and it’s not gross. It’s you.

Your pleasure matters, and you don’t need to lay down a towel.