R.E.S.T.

By Amy Berrafato, LMFT, CST

In an effort to be motivational, my grade school softball coach once told me that I run like molasses. At the time I didn’t realize what molasses was, so I was slow (pun intended!) on the uptake. Not that I was headed to play MLB any time soon, but I probably needed a different approach. How funny that 2.5 marathons later I have to wonder if on some level, my competitive nature set out to prove him otherwise. Perhaps I’ve been running and pushing myself ever since, in more ways than one. 

Do you have your own version of this? Pushing to prove something to someone, maybe even to yourself? Constantly staying busy and accommodating every one else’s needs but your own? Difficulties saying no? On the one hand, that drive to push is where so much ambition, high performance, and personal/professional growth can come from. What a resilient quality! On the other, it can also create patterns of perfectionism, poor boundaries, and mind-body disconnect when avoiding emotions. As Brene Brown says in Atlas of the Heart, “Where perfectionism exists, shame is always lurking.”

How about some REST, folks:

R. Resist the urge to push; recover instead. Give yourself a chance to slow down. Even just a moment’s pause can offer a gap between stimulus and response to decide yes or no. 

E. Energetic evaluation: How’s your energy? What drains you and what fills you up? Less of this, more of that, please.

S. Sensory mindfulness: Do a quick mind-body check…what does your mind, body, heart, spirit need right now?

T. Trust yourself: Listen to your intuition here. Your gut will guide you. 

This fall, this time of harvest, we have a chance to let go of what no longer serves us in order to make room for what’s to come. I invite you to rest rather than push. You deserve it!
Turns out that coach did inspire me: to become more like molasses and slow down in the ways that really matter.