New Year’s Resolution Troubles? There’s an App for That

By Rachel Zar, LMFT

We all entered into 2020 with big goals for ourselves and our relationships. But, even just a few weeks in, it’s becoming clear that focusing on those resolutions for the next 12 months will be tough. Rest assured: You don’t have to tough it out alone. In addition to filling your therapist in on your goals and intentions for the new year, let your phone in on the action for an extra dose of accountability. Here are three of the most common romantic resolutions I hear in my office – and the apps I love to help you achieve them.

Resolution: Reconnect with my partner. In the midst of hectic, busy lives, it’s far too easy for romantic gestures to get lost in the shuffle! What’s a busy couple to do?

An App for That: LoveNudge. My clients often take the “5 Love Languages” quiz to find the best ways to show each other that they care. LoveNudge, an app built specifically around this concept, reminds you of the best ways to show affection to your partner—whether it’s with words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts, acts of service, or quality time—and helps you build this information into habit with daily reminders and clever ideas.

Resolution: Spice up our sex life. There’s no question that sharing ideas for new sexual, erotic, or romantic experiences can be tricky – especially when you don’t know if your partner will be into the same things that you are.

An App for That: Kindu. This app simplifies these vulnerable conversations, offering over 1000 ideas that you and your partner can either opt into or say “no way” to – and the app lets you know where your desires overlap. I recommend not letting the app do all the talking, but use it as a jumping off point for conversations about what you’d like to explore in the new year.

Resolution: Get to really know myself sexually. What feels sexy to you? Knowing the answer to this question sets you up for a more fulfilling and pleasurable erotic life. But it’s often tricky to know where to start!

An App for That: DipSea. Listen to short and sexy audio stories to spark your erotic imagination. Especially for those who have trouble connecting to porn or sinking into the moment when fantasizing on their own, these tales—that cover a wide spectrum of genres and diverse interests—give you a jumping off point to inspire your solo or partnered experiences.